Survivorship

Words Are Individualized

These words and phrases often refer to people with cancer diagnoses and their experiences. Unfortunately, no consensus exists on the best language to describe people facing cancer. 

The language that individuals describe is as different as the individuals diagnosed. While we accept the differences in patients’ physical, emotional, and support needs, there is little to no empathy, compassion, awareness, or care about how someone wants to be described. 

The Myriad of Platitudes

I was watching TV when a commercial came on for one of those “Exposed to [THING]? Money has been set aside for victims of [whatever cancer]! CALL US TODAY!”—then the commercial proceeded to show images of gray-haired old men and just talked about how being exposed to whatever might cause cancer.

The High School Swimmer Turned Cancer Patient

I was on my high school swim team until my fourth cancer diagnosis on November 26, 2018, and until this past November, I wore my swim team sweatshirt all the time. One day last fall I picked it up to put it on and something stopped me.

Running “Away” from Cancer

For years before I had cancer, I was a runner. I started in 2014, just doing 5ks and eventually training for my first 10k. In 2016, I signed up for my first marathon and ran for a charity team. The same year, I got to see firsthand the charity work, and I knew I wanted to keep running marathons and fundraising for my cause.

Sweater Weather

Last December, I finished knitting a sweater that I’ve been working on for close to four years. I started the sweater just before I began chemotherapy at age 37, diagnosed with Stage 3c colon cancer after my second child was born. During my cancer treatment, I was balancing the demands of parenting, working, and being a patient, and it often felt like too much to bear. But when I’d pull out my yarn, I’d find a sense of equilibrium, and I’d lose myself in the knit and purl.

Coping Rhythms

Cancer wrecks careers, family goals, travel plans, marriages, relationships, dreams, and, most importantly, our health. You might think that grace would be extended to a person battling cancer and carrying their family through the trenches, but it often doesn’t happen. Meanwhile, cancer screams to team up against these awful cells, but your significant other wants to bail.

Choose Happiness

Don’t get me wrong, cancer is f’in hard and filled with ups and downs. It’s a really crappy rollercoaster that we don’t want to ride but were forced to ride. In order to maintain a bit of sanity, I needed to find ways to prioritize myself and focus on self-care and self love. Nowadays, some people ask me, “Carrie, how do you do it? How do you keep a positive attitude?” Trust me; it takes A LOT of work and dedication.

Seeing Beyond the Labels

If you were to visit the social media page of a cancer patient who openly shares their diagnosis, I’m willing to bet $5 that their comment section would resemble something like this: “You are so brave!”; “You are so strong!”; “You are an inspiration!”; “You are a warrior!” Seemingly well-meaning comments that end up feeling less like compliments and more like expectations.

Dude, Where’s My Erection? Part III

We’ve made it to the final installment of this series! Part I highlighted how and why erection problems can occur after cancer, and Part II outlined some of the pharmacological options available to help improve erectile function for cancer survivors. However, not all erection issues require a prescription, and not all penises respond well to medicines. 

Is This Mic On? Testing…123…Testing…

What we say to each other matters. Most of us know that but often speak before thinking. I know I have and will; I am human and make mistakes. I try to ensure my language is helpful, supportive, and sassy. I have learned that disclosing your cancer diagnosis invites people to share unsolicited thoughts, cancer stories, medical advice, opinions on your lifestyle, and so much more.